The adventure of LeafGreen and lots more!
by PoMZ
Summary: a mixture of fairy tales all in one. Legolas is LeafGreen, the blonde Prince of this story... PG for language
1. Leafgreen, 4 hungry hobbits and more!

**　Author's Note:** I was walking my dog and just came up with this little story. And I know Legolas name is Greenleaf, but I thought I'd change it to make it look like snow-white. _Leaf_-green, _snow_-white; get the drift?

**Disclaimer:** This is all what I do not own: Lord of the Rings things, any famous fairy tales including snow white, Wizard of OZ, etc. and any red mushrooms with white polka dots. Now I feel utterly miserable. Please Read on.

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**The Adventures of Leaf-Green and the dwarf, 4 hobbits, 2 shrubby looking men, and a wizard being the Narrator, and lots more!**

Once upon a time, like any other fairy tales will start, there was a hero/ heroine…

She/ him lived in a beautiful castle and sang songs about adventures in distant land or an attractive prince/ princess who will one day take his/her hand in marriage.

We can forget about them now, because they've got nothing to do with the story.

*~*~*

We switch our scene to Middle Earth, where a good-looking elf Prince of Mirkwood is talking to the trees. He is our main character, Leaf-Green. 

One day Leaf-Green was being miserable like all main characters are in the beginning of stories, when his two evil twin step brothers came and told him to get lost in the woods. So he did.

And although he made a trail of Lembas bread crumbs, he soon found that 4 hungry Hobbits had eaten it away while he wasn't looking. Suddenly he heard a voice from behind.

"Hey baby, where you going?" a talking hyena-wolf thing with shades chattered, "If you're going to your granny's, us three can have lots of fun…"but when he saw Legolas was a guy, and a guy with dangerous looking arrows, he howled as he fled out of sight.

After Leaf-Green walked along a mysterious yellow brick road, he found a weird tree house made from fairy bread. (If you don't what that is, it's a normal piece of bread cut into triangles with butter and hundreds and thousands sprinkled on them.) After he climbed the liquorish rope, he knocked on a door that said, "Keep out, wicked witch of the Lothlorien Forest ain't happy."

"Mrs. Witch, Mrs. Witch, let me come in?"

"Not by the beautiful blonde hair of my golden head, head." The witch replied.

"Then I'll huff and I'll puff, and eat through your…!" Legolas threatened.

The chocolate-coated marshmallow door was opened and Gladriel gave an evil death stare to Legolas as she growled,

"NOT the chocolate-coated marshmallow door; you don't want to get on my bad side bitch."

She was really angry. When Leaf-Green asked her why she just recited a poem, which went like this:

"If you climb upon the second floor,

You will see the man I used to adore.

You shall find lying on the third bed,

An bastard of a dwarf cursed in hairy red."

Then she left silently and gracefully, leaving an air of mystery. (Ok, this rhyming better stop, mop, top, hop.)

Leaf-Green, being blonde and very bored, did as she said and went up stairs. He found the first bed was too hard. The second bed was too soft. But the third bed, the third bed was juuuuust right. And sitting on the bed was another angry looking character, but he had an unusually long and thick red beard. Legolas checked the name on the bed and it said Gimli.

Legolas exclaimed, "Gimli my man, I mean dwarf. I didn't notice you with all that hair. Is this you new look?"

"No," grumbled the over-bearded dwarf, "The bloody witch cursed me. We had a fight; she couldn't handle my ego."

Leaf-Green 's face fell. "O me gosh. _You're _the guy Gladriel "used to adore"? But…But your not even half her height!"

Gimli huffed in anger. "Don't treat me like I'm some sort of midget!" he bellowed, " I'm a real man!"

Suddenly Gimli's beard grew a few more inches, making it even harder to spot where his beetroot red face was. A wail of despair was heard from the sea of thick red curls.

Leaf-Green decided to leave his shaggy friend and went back down to the kitchen in the first floor. He found that the wicked witch had left a red mushroom with white polka dots on the bench. He was hungry so he ate it. Then the Prince of Mirkwood went into a deep sleep without being noticed for a century or so.

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**Author**: (to a hundred thousand angry Legolas fan girls.) Wait, HE'S NOT DEAD! HE'S NOT DEAD! Remember, elves are immortal so just think of it as a long coma. (Sighs as the not-yet satisfied fan girls leave.) *Smirks* He's not dead, YET. Find out what happens on next chap!


	2. 100years l8er

**Disclaimer**: See the first chapter. I also don't own Aladdin, Cinderella or Ali G stuff. If there's anything else, point it out to me and I'll include it into my Don't Own List and feel even more depressed. Enjoy.

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**The Adventures of Leaf-Green and the dwarf, 4 hobbits, 2 shrubby looking men, and a wizard being the Narrator, and lots more!**

100yrs after the incident with Leaf-Green getting knocked out by eating a red mushroom with white polka dots, a brave king of the west realizes that he was actually missing. He was Aragorn, ex-ranger, Lord of Gondor and the dirtiest character in the whole of Middle Earth. At least he doesn't stink as much anymore after he married.

Anywho, Aragorn found the rotting Fairy Bread tree house where Leaf-Green was last seen. Ants and scavengers already ate the liquorish rope so he couldn't climb up, but the wise king new exactly what to do.

"Gimli, Gimli, let down your beard!" he yelled towards the second floor window.

Aragorn heard a few muffles from the bedroom, and then a waterfall of fuzzy red facial hair tumbled down to his feet. He climbed up the unexpectedly soft wooly beard until he could reach the chocolate-coated marshmallow doors、which had melted and was moldy from the one hundred years and was extremely sticky when he opened it.

When the king entered the house he saw Leaf-Green sound asleep on the kitchen floor. But something else caught his eye too.

A mysterious golden ring was lying in the middle of a carpet, as if beckoning to be picked up. Aragorn ignored the unconscious elf, and picked up the ring. He was pretty sure he saw letters engraved on it before, but it had disappeared. But the wise king had much knowledge of mysterious things so he confidently rubbed the ring. Nothing happened.

He got pissed off so he cast the ring into the fires, when "POOF!" another scabby looking man appeared. Except this guy was a little bit more transparent then the king.

"Dude! Boromir, what are you doing here?" the king shouted from surprise, "I thought you were dead?"

The wispy Boromir coughed and pointed at where his feet should be. But his feet weren't there. Aragorn gasped.

"Hey dude! You can fly!!"

"He can fly?" Gimli retorted from upstairs.

"He can fly!!" sang the 4 Hobbits from no-where.

"I'M A GHOST!" Boromir shrieked. Aragorn figured it out at last and did a silent "ohhh." and listened to what his deceased friend had to say.

"After I died I was bound to this stupid ring!" Boromir explained (more like complained) " I can grant three wishes to the rightful owner of the ring."

"Woo hoo! I can have anything I want then? Is there a catch?" Aragorn asked excitedly.

"Well," Boromir hesitated, "If you can't fit the ring on your finger you're not the rightful owner and…"

Aragorn tried to pick up the ring, but burnt his hand from the fire. After he carefully got it from the stove with tongs, he forces the ring through his finger but it was way too small. He cursed angrily as he threw it on the floor.

Suddenly, "The ring is mine! MINE!!" Gollum appeared from nowhere and tried to fit the ring but it was too big for his bony hands and slips to the ground. He screeched as he jumped out the window.

Then one of the four Hobbits, whom were still there quietly in the background, stepped up. He picked the magic ring up and put it on. It fit him perfectly.

"Well Frodo," Boromir the ghost sighed, "you seem to be the rightful owner."

There was a buzz of excitement as everybody tried to tell Frodo what they wanted, but it was confusing because as soon as Frodo put on the ring he vanished at the same time. After things settled down Frodo fumbled with the ring as he decided what he should wish for.

"I have made a conclusion," he announced, "That I could wish for MPS or something that's impossible like world peace, but I know those things wont last for long so I am going to make things that were wrong for too long, right."

He walked to the staircase and yelled "My first wish is this: Gimli, I undo your curse!"

A yelp of joy could be heard from the second floor and Gimli stomped down the stairs to thank Frodo. After Frodo got out of Gimli's tight grasp, he continued his wishes.

"For my next wish," he said in a low and mystical voice, "I ask Legolas to wake up!"

The elf stirred and sat up. He yawned as he asked what the hell was going on.

"And to end my three wishes," Frodo whispered, strutting gracefully towards Boromir's ghost "I give you freedom from this ring, and give back your life Boromir."

Everybody was stunned. It wasn't because the wishes were coming true, but because Frodo was actually acting nice! They all cheered and congratulated him, all except Boromir who coughed to get everybody's attention.

"Ah, sorry to bust your bubbles guys, especially when Frodo was nice for once, but…" Boromir scratched his head as he confessed, "the wishes only last until twelve at midnight."

There was a big silence as everybody's jaws fell, except for the grinning black curly headed Hobbit.

"Yeah, I knew. It was written on the ring." He smirked "Ha! Gottcha guys!!"

And so nobody lived happily ever after. The end

*~*~*~

"What a crappy story!" Pippin exclaimed.

"What a rip off!" Merry spat.

Gandalf frowned as the two hobbits grudged and bitched about his proud tale.

"It was sooo unoriginal." Pippin complained.

"Ye-ah, it was like, totally unrealistic too," Merry nagged like a girl, "I mean, like, red mushrooms with white polka dots? Pl-ease."

"I know, its like, so five seconds ago." Pippin rolled his eyes.

Gandalf puffed on his pipe angrily.

"Don't go there girl-friend!" he put on a wanna be voice as he held his palm out, " Talk to the hand, coz the head ain't listenin."

Merry held out his elbow, "Talk to the elbow coz the hand don't wanna hear it!"

"Sold!" Pippin sneered and the two hobbits laughed as they watched the old wise wizard leave, defeated.

And they probably lived happily ever after. THE END

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**Author:** Ok, things got a bit out of hand in the end but that's all! Hope you understood it all, its just all for fun so hope u got to laugh! Reviews will be appreciated. See ya next fan fic! *Runs away before Legolas fan girls tries to hunt her down*


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